The year 2020 has been badass. And I mean bad (and an) ass. It started with the eruption of the Taal Volcano, simultaneous with the bushfire in Australia, followed by the death of Kobe Bryant (and many other celebrities here and abroad). And just when we thought it cannot get any worse, the COVID-19 pandemic hit the world, which paralyzed pretty much everything. It changed our lives forever.
At least I was still able to go back to Davao for an overnight official (food) trip, as well as bring my mom to Batanes 2-3 weeks before things went all-out crazy beginning March.
Things have been crazy at work, too. Onto my sixth year doing the same job, this has been the most challenging year to handle so far. Businesses were heavily affected and so we need to extend financial assistance to many, especially those who can no longer pay. Guidelines of mandatory grace period on loan repayments were not clear at the beginning, leaving all parties clueless and unsure what to do. We got over these hurdles after a few months and the work-from-home set-up is becoming more and more normal as days passed, although we still physically report to the office twice or thrice a week as skeleton workforce. This year more than ever made me appreciate having a stable job at the Bank, recognizing not everyone was lucky enough to keep theirs. There were issues here and there, in fact one after another, all of which in God's grace I have managed to survive, one breakdown and one "ayoko-na-talaga" at a time.
Badly needing some sanity break, I did not let go of my Boracay trip this December, even if going there means having to go through strict health protocols including getting swab-tested. Easily the best place on earth, Boracay was disturbingly quiet but ever so calming during this visit. My day would start as early as 5:30 in the morning, just so I can watch the sunrise before swimming in the beach and/or pool and eating breakfast (for 2!) at the hotel's restaurant, with the beach in the background. I would then lounge and chill for hours with just good music on, drink fruit shakes on the side (yup wholesome), take a nap, write my MBA papers (huhu), eat lunch, walk around, take pictures, appreciate the calm, wait for the best sunsets, have dinner, overthink things. As a solo girl traveler, I did not even dare walk alone as it is already too dark and sketchy at night. I could imagine this is how it is 10-15 years ago: too pure and too pristine. Though, I can't help but feel sad seeing very few people, shops/hotels/restaurants closed, and locals with little to no source of income. It particularly hit me when I asked one local as to how life is going for them in the island and he said: "Wala, Ma'am, nganga kami." You see, when I arrived at the airport, I only saw the likes of Henann (where I stayed), The Lind, or the Shangri-La of the world waiting for their guests, the only companies who can quickly survive and recover. The small businesses, they are practically dead.
Or should I say they were killed? First, by the COVID-19 pandemic. But more at this point, by the incompetence of the government to curtail the spread of the virus and to bring the economy back to life. Everyday we see or hear cringeworthy news, disturbing ones even, rooted from bad government decisions and stupid disaster response that make Filipinos suffer. It is bad enough we have clowns running the country, worse without wide media coverage due to the ABSCBN shutdown, with super typhoons devastating certain provinces. Let this year be the year we demand accountability from the officials who are meant to serve, us. This year and the next, I hope we stop romanticizing Filipino resiliency, which erases the narrative of those who did not survive. (PS. Register to fckng vote. Millennials, we are #40MillionStrong!)
The pandemic did not only reveal the incompetence of the government and the lapses with our systems and institutions, it also revealed our true nature, who our real friends are, and who are meant to stay in our lives. Despite not being physically able to see friends and family, I've managed to keep in touch with the most important ones. I am grateful knowing fully that there are people who will never leave my side, listening intently to my (nonsense) stories at 12mn onwards and checking up on me, despite having their own fair share of struggles as sure this has been a tough year for everyone. I hope in my little ways of simply being there and/or showing up, I am able to do the same for them, reciprocating the same level of love and concern. Don't we all love low maintenance friendships? I also learned that sometimes, people will give up on you. And that’s okay, too. To the people who’s been there for me, I appreciate all of you.
Outside I have a very strong personality, in my car I’m fragile af. And I cry A LOT. What is holding me up, you may ask. The answer would be in the little things: binge-watching the Modern Love series on my free time, listening to LANY's Mama's Boy album, watching online concerts, grabbing Tim Hortons coffee, eating best ramen at Mendokoro, or witnessing Manila Bay sunsets on my way home. Finally, coming home to my mom and her cooking, her hugs, or just her mere presence. Everytime I’m hoping I don't get to bring any bad elements (aka virus) home that would compromise her health. I'm sorry for the times I might have compromised the safety of anyone close to me. After all, it is our shared responsibility to keep each other safe, and as the Italian Prime Minister puts it, "We need to stay separated today, so we can hug each other tomorrow." Needless to say, keeping safe and maintaining good health is the biggest blessing we can ever have this year. Thank You, Lord, for giving me, my family and friends exactly that.
The best way to stop the spread of the virus is to wear masks at all times as well as practice social distancing. And so pretty much everything went virtual. My MBA moved by a full one trimester, and proceeded online come July. It was difficult at first. Things would have been better and learnings would have been maximized face-to-face. I don't quite like the self-study aspect to it, but it is manageable at the very least. (No, it's not, I'm dying hahaha) But, thank you to our selfless professors for their adjustment and sacrifices. To lessen the burden, I have the best groupmates, too! Just like that, we are five subjects and a comprehensive examination away from finally getting this degree, and I am so excited to finish this one strong with at least 30+ of the most professional, smartest, best-at-cramming people I have had the privilege of knowing. Realizing there are only nine months left for this entire journey is just bittersweet.
From one bittersweet story to another. Well, the events industry is one of the most affected industries, including The Milk Tea Lounge, my family's little baby project. We were able to do at least five events prior quarantine, which included UP Fair. In my books it is one of the most humbling experiences. We overestimated and prepared at least 300 cups for this event, of which only half was sold. At half the intended price. In any case, I am equally excited as to what is in store for next year as events and gatherings are slowly being allowed. I realized things will not always go as planned, and we are bound to get disappointed when we set our expectations too high.
This applies to almost everything. Twelve months ago we are all so excited about 2020. We say we will strive to be better, we will achieve more, be more and do more. December 2019 feels like ages ago. The old normal seems so far away. Unattainable even, at this point. Indeed, we are not the same people we were last year. But we are survivors.
And if all you did this year was survive, know that I am proud of you. It's been tough, yet you endured.
This is also for the frontliners, who endured the most in these trying times. The healthcare providers, the essential workers, retail and grocery store employees, bank operations staff, janitors, security guards, delivery riders and everyone risking their lives to serve others. We are grateful for you, thank you.
To everyone, keep the faith. Praying that 2021 will be so much better for all of us. Lol I mean, the standard is set too low? As for me, I am particularly excited for *something I'm not supposed to tell you yet* but as an #AnakNgDiyos (see my 2018 blog mwah) I'm claiming this is going to materialize! My dad is also going home for good to the Philippines so there's that, and finally I am looking forward to the day I can be out with friends again, hug people, or go on trips or travel again without fear of contracting any virus whatsoever. To live simply, and live life normally.
May next year be a breakthrough year in all possible aspects: personal/family life, love, career and everything in between.
Hopeful,
KRTRT <3
